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What Thou Wiliest"

"What Thou wiliest, what Thou wiliest... " this was the Mother's way —from the most outward action to the most arduous demands of the transformation.

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.. .the body says to the Supreme Lord:

"What You want me to be, I shall be,

what You want me to know, I shall know,

what You want me to do, I shall do."

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May 20, 1914

From the height of that summit which is the identification with Thy divine infinite Love, Thou didst turn my eyes to this complex body which has to serve Thee as Thy instrument. And Thou didst tell me, "It is myself; dost thou not see my light shining in it?" And indeed I saw Thy divine Love, clothed in intelligence, then in strength, constituting this body in its smallest cells and shining so brightly in it that it was nothing but a combination of millions of radiant sparks, all manifesting that they were Thyself....

I am... in the imperceptible but infinite heart of each of the atoms constituting my body.

*

July 10, 1914

The working in the constitution of the physical cells is perceptible: permeated with a considerable amount of force they seem to expand and to become lighter.

*

November 3, 1914

It is Thyself and Thou alone who livest, even in the least atom of the body-substance itself.

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February 9, 1972

The psychic consciousness was always there ruling the being and guiding it. And all impressions, everything was placed before it in this way... so that it might give the right direction. And the physical also was all the time as though listening always to the command from the Divine. But the thing was constant, constant — before I came here. I came here in that state — it was long ago.

March 30, 1972

Yesterday, it was fifty-eight years since I came here for the first time. For fifty-eight years I have been working for that, for the body to be as transparent and as immaterial as possible, in other words, not to be an obstruction to the Force that is coming down.

Now, now it is the body, the body itself that wants it with all its cells. That is the only reason for its existence. To try, to try to realise on earth a purely transparent, translucid element which would allow the Force to act without distorting it.

When one plays music or does painting, one sees very well that the consciousness enters into the cells and these cells become conscious.

This experience, for example: there are things in a box and one says to the hand: "Take twelve"; (without counting, like that), the hand picks up the twelve and gives them to you. That is an experience that I had long, long ago. At the age of twenty I started having experiences like that, therefore I know. I knew how the consciousness works.

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I can tell you one thing, that is, when I began with Sri Aurobindo to descend for the yoga, to descend from the mind into the vital, when we brought down our yoga from the mind into the vital, within one month — I was forty at that time, I didn't look old, I looked younger than forty, but still I was forty — and after a month's yoga I looked exactly eighteen. And someone who had seen me before, who had lived with me in Japan and came here, found it difficult to recognise me. He asked me, "But really, is it you?" I said, "Obviously!"

*

You see how it is, now I am nearing a hundred, it's only five years away now. I started making an effort to become conscious at five years old, my child. This is to let you know.... And I go on, and it goes on. Only... Of course, I have come to the point where I am doing the work for the cells of the body, but still, the work began a long time ago....

The body... the body is made of a substance which is still very heavy, and it is the substance itself which has to change for the Supermind to be able to manifest.

Oh! Volumes would be needed to narrate what is happening.... It is... extraordinarily interesting and altogether new. New altogether.

*

To exist only for the Divine. To exist only through the Divine. To exist only in the service of the Divine. To exist only... by becoming the Divine.

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.. .I am here because my body has been given for the first attempt at transformation. Sri Aurobindo told me so. Well, I am doing it. .. .everybody will be able to benefit from it.

*

...since it is happening in one body, it can happen in all bodies! I am not made of something different from the others. The difference is in consciousness, that is all.

*

I am absolutely convinced, because I have had experiences which proved it to me, that the life of this body — the life which makes it move and change — can be replaced by a force; that is to say, one can create a kind of immortality, and the wear and tear can also disappear.

*

For the first time... I saw myself, my body — I do not know whether it is the Supramental body or... (how to say it?) a body in transition, but I had a body altogether new...

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.. .from time to time there are some [cells] that scold the others. It is very amusing! They scold, they catch hold of them, tell them stupidities (in their way) — to those that want {Mother draws a small circle) to continue the old habits... all the functions must be done according to the method of Nature; and when it is not like that, they become anxious. And then those that know, catch hold of them and put them under heavy bombardment in the name of the Lord. It is very amusing!

...and then there are conversations among the cells (Mother laughs): "Imbecile that you are! Why do you have fear? Don't you see it is the Lord himself who is doing this to transform you?" And the other: "Ah!..." Then it remains quiet, and then opens itself and waits, and then... the pain goes away, the disorder goes away, and everything is put in order.

It is wonderful.

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I might say: the cells of the body must learn to seek their support only in the Divine, until the moment when they are able to feel that they are the expression of the Divine.

*

...all the cells that have been especially developed and have become conscious of the divine Presence within them, are scattered and enter other combinations in which they awaken, by contagion, the consciousness of the Presence that each one has had.

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... we exist by the divine Will and not by the ego. The ego was a means — a means for many centuries — now it is worth nothing, its time has passed. Now... consciousness, it is the Divine; power, it is the Divine; action, it is the Divine; individuality, it is the Divine.

*

Sri Aurobindo has said this many times in many forms: Endure and you'll conquer... bear — bear and you'll vanquish.

Triumph comes to the most enduring.

These are the two absolutely indispensable things: endurance, and a faith that nothing can shake, even an apparently complete negation, even if you suffer... to endure.

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...I tell you: "It does not matter, do not worry if you are occupied with your body; only try to profit by that — profit by this preoccupation — to bring into it the Peace, the Peace."

Always it is as though I was enveloping you within a cocoon of Peace.

And then, if you could put, precisely into this mind that vibrates, stirs all the while, truly like a monkey, if you could put there... it is a Peace which acts directly in this material vibration — a Peace in which everything relaxes.

.. .put the Peace, feel the Peace, live the Peace, know the Peace — the Peace, the Peace.

That is the only thing.

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At the centre of each cell lies the Divine Consciousness. By aspiration and repeated self-giving, the cells must be made transparent.

*

Indeed, the cells which are able to vibrate to the contact of divine joy, to receive and preserve it, are regenerated cells on the way to becoming immortal.

*

.. .at every second all the cells must be (gesture of motionless offering upward) in an adoration, in an aspiration — an adoration, an aspiration, an adoration... and nothing else. Then after a time there is also delight, then that ends in blissful trust. When this trust is established all will be well. But... it is easy to say, it is much more difficult to do. Only, for the moment I am convinced that this is the only means, there is no other.

*

Something has opened and developed within... and then... then it was the direct contact, without any intermediary — direct contact. And that it has now, all the while. All the while, all the while, the direct contact. And it is the body, it is not through all kinds of things and states of being, not at all, it is direct.

But once it is done (Sri Aurobindo has said this), once one body has done it, it has the capacity to pass it on to others: and I tell you, now... all of a sudden one or another experience occurs in people....

It is contagious, this I know. And it is the only hope....

Transform the body of the mortal like a sweet and magical rhyme;

Bridge our earthhood and heavenhood, make deathless the children of Time.

Sri Aurobindo

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Throughout all this life, knowingly or unknowingly, I have been what the Lord wanted me to be, I have done what the Lord wanted me to do. That alone matters.

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. .the body, the body has one prayer — and it is always the same:

Make me worthy of knowing Thee,

Make me worthy of serving Thee,

Make me worthy of being Thee.

I feel in myself a growing force... but it is of a new quality....

in silence and in contemplation.

Nothing is impossible (Mother opens her hands upward).

*

I think, I think that it is the only thing.

I am repeating always: "What Thou wiliest, what Thou wiliest,

what Thou wiliest... let it be what Thou wiliest,

may I do what Thou wiliest,

may I be conscious of what Thou wiliest."...

I have the feeling that it is... that I am That....

*

...this "Thou" is not something that is up there in some far-off region and whom one does not know: He is everywhere, He is in everything, He is there constantly, He is within the being — and you cling to Him in that way; this is the only solution.

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Because Thou art All-beauty and All-bliss,

My soul blind and enamoured yearns for Thee;

It bears Thy mystic touch in all that is

And thrills with the burden of that ecstasy.

Behind all eyes I meet Thy secret gaze

And in each voice I hear Thy magic tune:

Thy sweetness haunts my heart through Nature's ways;

Nowhere it beats now from Thy snare immune.

It loves Thy body in all living things;

Thy joy is there in every leaf and stone:

The moments bring Thee on their fiery wings;

Sight's endless artistry is Thou alone.

Time voyages with Thee upon its prow —

And all the future's passionate hope is Thou.

Sri Aurobindo

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GLORY to Thee, O Lord, who triumphest over every obstacle.

Grant that nothing in us shall be an obstacle in Thy work.

Grant that nothing may retard Thy manifestation...

Grant that Thy will be done in all things and at every moment.

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We stand here before Thee that Thy will may be fulfilled in us, in every element, in every activity of our being, from our supreme heights to the smallest cells of the body.

Grant that we may be faithful to Thee utterly and for ever.

We would be completely under Thy influence to the exclusion of every other.

Grant that we may never forget to own towards Thee a deep, an intense gratitude.

Grant that we may never squander any of the marvelous things that are Thy gifts to us at every instant.

Grant that everything in us may collaborate in Thy work and all be ready for Thy realization.

Glory to Thee, O Lord, Supreme Master of all realisation.

Give us a faith active and ardent, absolute and unshakable in Thy Victory.

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Message in Sri Aurobindo's handwriting

Distributed on 1 January 1989

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